WHAT IF?

It was late Sunday night, September 26th when I got into bed after returning home from a South Bend trip to see my mother and grandmother. As I closed my eyes drifted into a deep sleep I did not imagine that in just three hours I would be jolted violently from peace into panic. “PAP !! PAP-PAP !! PAP –PAP!!!” My eyes opened wide and I glanced quickly at my window which illuminated with each sound. It was gunfire. I rolled over to my right (the side of my bed that was furthest away from my window) as quickly as I could, bruising my right knee on the floor as I fell to it for safety. “Romona???” I heard my roommate’s voice in the hallway outside of my bedroom. I was breathing deeply and shaking almost uncontrollably. I held my cell phone in my hand, preparing to dial 9-1-1. “Nikki??!?” I answered her, “GET DOWN NOW!” Nikki hit the floor and crawled into my room.
We’ve heard the gunshots before, but never have they been so close. This time, it had to have been right in front of our apartment. As I called the police I tried to slow my breathing. I had so many thoughts racing through my head, “Is anyone hit? Is anyone hurt? Is anyone dead? Is it anyone I know???” “This is 9-1-1, what is your emergency?” Answered a rather apathetic voice. “Yeah, there was a shooting right outside of my house. There was just a shooting…” “What is your address ma’am?” “1331 North Avers St. I’m in West Humboldt Park” “Okay, how many shots did you hear ma’am?” “5 gunshots…there were…1, 2, 3…yeah, 5 gunshots.” “Is there anyone hurt or injured?” “No, no…not that I know of, I’m on the ground in my room…I really don’t know.” “Did you hear a vehicle ma’am?” “No…there was no vehicle. Just the gunshots.” “Okay, we’ll send someone out.” “CLICK!”
That was the conversation I had with the dispatcher at approximately 4:30am on Monday September 27th as I laid on the floor with a bruised knee, a pounding heart, and fear pumping through almost every blood vessel within me. It is now October 2nd. We have yet to see the police. They never made it to my street that late night/early morning.
So, Nikki and I called on a more reliable source that night as we laid on the floor crawling towards each other. We held hands, I cried, and we prayed. I still look down at the bruise on my right knee. It’s bright purple and red now. It hurts less as the days go by. I wish I could say the same about my heart. It’s not a favorable position – on the floor, startled out of your sleep by gunshots. But what if. . .? What if Nikki and I did not know the Lord? What if we did not have a heart for this community and the people within it? What if we didn’t know the children on our block who heard the same gunshots that night and feared for their lives and their loved ones’ lives? What if…I was the shooter and not the prayer warrior and Christ-lover who merely heard the shots that night? SO many ‘What If’s’ to ponder. I thank God for his grace. I thank him for sparing my life that night. I am thankful for being amongst the living for just one more day. And I pray that I will continue to tell others about how great this God of grace is, even in the midst of gunfire on my block. Please pray that my labor not be in vain. Please pray that God will save us all from ourselves and from the enemy that daily seeks to take our lives; from the shooter in West Humboldt Park to those who lie on the ground pleading with God for revival in our land.
Please continue to pray. The lives of so many depend upon your prayers and your support. . .